"What is mine is his! There is no separation or distinction between us. I am entirely responsible for him."
Kashinath left soon after to live alone in the Khandoba Temple on the outskirts of the village.
Readings and group discussions on sacred texts were held daily at Shirdi among Sai Baba's disciples. Kashinath attended these sessions. One day Sai Baba saw him carrying Panchadashi , a famous text on Vedanta by Swami Vidyaranya. Sai Baba remarked, "Everything about God's knowledge is explained in this book." Kashinath admitted that he understood little of what the book contained. Sai Baba told him, "Slowly and steadily, you will know it," meaning he would gain the experience of God, not mere intellectual understanding. Gradually, Kashinath lost interest in hearing esoteric wisdom and stopped attending the readings. Absorbed in his inner experience, Kashinath had now gone beyond others' words. He himself had become the Singer, but the glory of the Song was yet to manifest.
In February 1912, news came of the death of Kashinath's third wife, but he expressed no sorrow. Worldly ties could no longer bind him. The penitent was absorbed only in the notes of his Song, and he was gaining the secret knowledge to teach his Song to others.
Under Sai Baba's instruction, food was brought to Kashinath at the temple by a certain devotee. But after some days Sai ordered the devotee to stop, saying it had not been prepared with love. Kashinath stopped eating, refused any other food brought to him and began to fast. This fast was to last for one full year. During this time, Kashinath became completely emaciated, but he also became revered by the local populace. Out of reverence he was renamed Upasni Shastri, and later Upasni Maharaj , due to his upasna (worship) and upas (fasting).1
Due to prolonged fasting, Upasni's health weakened and his pulse grew feeble. But his countenance was always fresh and bright. Devotees of Sai Baba would bring him food but he would not eat it; he left it for the dogs and crows to devour.
During this year-long fast, the ascetic was rude and abusive to anyone who visited him at the Khandoba Temple. But acting displeased and refusing all offerings was only a pretext on Upasni's part.2 He had finally seen the face of the Singer! He himself was becoming the Song!
Footnotes
- 1.Meher Baba once referred to Upasni Maharaj as the "king of the yogis."
- 2.Gustadji (a later close disciple of Meher Baba) was one of the visitors to the temple. He related that he was put off when he discovered that Upasni Maharaj had gathered human waste and spread it along all the paths to the temple to dissuade visitors from coming to see him.