Meredith thought she was weeping and said, "Cry if you will, child. Cry if you will!"
Throughout Baba's stay, Meredith proudly ordered about the mandali, who acted as if they were obediently obeying him. Though this "show" was a headache to Baba, he tolerated it — all for the sake of his work — and even criticized Chanji's service in comparison to Meredith's! Privately, he expressed his dissatisfaction with Meredith's insistence on observing the usual routine of the retreat, while Baba was physically present.
"The freedom to do my work in my own way is lost," Baba explained.
Baba threatened to cancel his trip to America unless Meredith stopped suggesting things and agreed to obey Baba implicitly, to which Meredith agreed.
But on Thursday, 21 April 1932, Meredith told Baba in a demanding tone, "I want God-realization, but I need money, too!" Baba just smiled and made no comment. Baba was tolerating Meredith's behavior for the sake of some of his lovers there. During Baba's first visit to England, many had been "snared" in the Master's net; but thereafter, a few new ones had heard of Baba through Meredith and fallen under his influence. Baba had gone again to Devonshire to contact them. Unknown at the time, this was to be Baba's last visit to the East Challacombe retreat.
At 2:00 P.M. on the 22nd, Baba went for a walk to the beach after lunch. Pointing to the ocean, Baba remarked to the group present:
I am like the ocean you see before you — always ready to receive anything, good or bad, or anyone, healthy or sick, saint or sinner. I can absorb anything and everything! So dedicate everything to me — all your actions, good or bad, all your thoughts — all and everything. Lay them at my feet and be free!
I am like the sunshine which falls evenly on all objects. But if a person holds an umbrella over his head, he does not benefit from the sun's rays. The umbrella prevents the sun from shining on him.
Your sanskaras can be compared to the umbrella which prevents you from receiving rays of light from the guru. You have to close this sanskaric umbrella in order to receive the 'light' from the Master. Only then will you tangibly acquire the light.
To do this, only think of me and keep me in your thoughts.