That evening, they went to a play, but it turned out to be in French, which none, including Meredith, could understand. The next day Rustom went to buy a tie and some breeches for Chanji in the bazaar. When Baba found out, he scolded Chanji, who answered in defense that he did not ask for them; Rustom was simply replacing what he had borrowed from Chanji earlier.
Nonetheless, Baba reprimanded Chanji, "You called for them indirectly. Don't hide your desires; you wanted them. Despite acquiring them through Rustom, you still say you did not ask for them?!"
Chanji took Baba's scolding badly; he was fed up and could not bear his teasing anymore. Unknown to the Westerners, since arriving in Europe, Baba had been taunting Chanji mostly, wounding his heart by becoming angry with him on the smallest pretext. On one occasion, Kitty innocently asked Baba why Chanji and Rustom were looking so sad since they were with him all the time.
Baba had brushed her off, replying, "Due to their deep love. They are not sad; it is the pain of love. Their love for me is unbearable to them!"
Traveling with Meher Baba to the West might appear to an outsider as a "fun vacation," but life with the Master was a life of death for the disciple. Only a few days before, when the train had stopped in Paris and they got down for a coffee, Baba's pricking had begun. Chanji later wrote in his diary: "Everyone wishes to be with Baba, but few know the price of it."
Baba's real work was to crush the false selves of his circle members, and this was a painful and often humiliating process. For instance, at Baba's remarks about Chanji's new clothes, Chanji took them off and slung them on the floor, bitterly complaining, "Now I can no longer stay with you. I am leaving!"
Baba responded sharply, "Go! Who needs you? But don't defy or threaten me, thus throwing away everything [spiritual]. It doesn't matter if you go away; I can manage everything. I will break my silence so that there will be no necessity for anyone to read the board. I myself am fed up with all this dictation. I shall go neither to America nor anywhere else! I shall return to India! I do not wish to go there at this time. But if I do go, it will be because of him [Chanji], against my will and plans."