True spiritual mastery is achieved through complete self-emptying and devotion.
"Becoming the sandals worn on the Master's feet"
Avatar Meher Baba Ki Jai
Khorshed Kaikhushru Irani
Soonamasi's daughter and Mehera's companion; prepared Baba's food
โSmall Khorshed; Chandulaโ
Khorshed Kaikhushru Irani was born on 2 May 1910, the only child of Kaikhushru Masa, a Zoroastrian jeweler of Bombay who was among Meher Baba's earliest followers, and his wife Soonamasi, the younger sister of Gulmai Irani. She first saw Baba on 9 May 1922, at the age of twelve, on a train to Sakori, and from then on she dedicated her life to him. Soon afterwards Baba walked into the family's Bombay home and told her to visit him daily after school at Manzil-e-Meem. She heard Baba speak and sing for more than three years before he began his silence, and late in life she was one of very few who still remembered his voice.
In 1923 Baba introduced her to Mehera, and the two became lifelong best friends. In 1924 Khorshed was with Mehera at Sakori as her companion, and Baba then housed Mehera with Khorshed and her parents in Bombay. When Jamshed's widow, several years older, also joined the women, the two Khorsheds became known as Big Khorshed and Small Khorshed. On her birthday in 1926 Baba wrote that Mehera was Radha and that Khorshed was Radha's best friend Chandrika, and he gave her the nickname Chandula.
From the autumn of 1924 Khorshed lived with the women mandali in their secluded quarters at Meherabad, as one of the first six women to stay there permanently; joined by her mother in 1925, she later lived at Toka, Nasik and on Meherabad Hill. At her father's deathbed in Nasik in January 1931, Baba asked her to sing a ghazal so that Masa's mind would stay on God. In April 1933 she greeted the newly arrived Western women at Kandivli near Bombay with the cry "Baba found!", and in 1937 she travelled with Baba and the women to France.
When the New Life began in 1949, Baba sent Khorshed and her mother to live in Bombay. Khorshed at first withheld the promise he asked for, saying it was of no use now that he was separating her from him; Baba replied that those bound by his instructions can never be separate from him, and she promised. Through the 1950s and 1960s she lived with her mother in their Bombay flat, often called to stay with Baba and the women at Meherazad, Mahabaleshwar or Guruprasad. Her last time with him was at Meherazad in December 1968, when Baba asked her to stay two extra days.
After Baba dropped his body in 1969, Khorshed cared for her mother until Soonamasi died in 1973. In 1981 she moved to Khushru Quarters in Ahmednagar, her cousin Adi K. Irani's family home and now Meher Nazar, the office of the Avatar Meher Baba Trust, where she lived in two small rooms with her adopted family, Sudam and Asha Wagh and their daughters. For nearly two decades she welcomed pilgrims with stories of her life with Baba and taught the children of the compound to sing his arti. She died in her room there on 4 August 1999 at the age of 89, and her ashes were interred at Upper Meherabad beside Meher Baba's Samadhi. Her stories were later published as Fortunate to Love Him (2017).
โBe good. Think of me and we will meet again.
โ May 1922, Sakori: to twelve-year-old Khorshed, after asking her mother Soonamasi to promise to come and stay with him
โI will not be back for twelve years. You should stay here and remember me. This time I won't be taking you with me to Quetta.
โ June 1924, Bombay: to Soonamasi and Khorshed before leaving for Quetta. Khorshed wept, but Baba did not change his mind
โKeep it with you; it will be useful someday.
โ 1947, Satara: handing Khorshed an empty tin, days before giving her and Soonamasi their own cooking at Meherabad
โHave you ever seen doodh pak puri in your life? Has your father ever tasted it? Is this doodh pak or gruel for a sick man? Do I look ill to you?
โ Irani Mansion, Bombay, mid-1924: Mehera and Khorshed cooked doodh pak with puris for Baba, but the milk would not thicken and Mehera added flour. Baba sent for the two of them.
โAs the fire burns in the stove, so should the fire of love burn in your heart!
โ Irani Mansion, Bombay, mid-1924: the day after the failed doodh pak, Baba had Mehera and Khorshed make potato patties, cooked the dish himself in the kitchen, and pointed to the hot stove.
โIt means that you don't want my love? โฆ I worry for whomever I love. The lover is distressed for the Beloved, but the Beloved is unimaginably more troubled for his lover. My luck, my fate is like that โ full of troubles, discomfort, distress and disquiet โ because I am the Beloved of all!
โ Nasik, January 1931: Baba told the women that his great love for them was a source of trouble to him. Mehera, Naja and Khorshed, hurt, exclaimed that he should not be troubled on their account.
In May 1922 at Sakori, Baba asked Soonamasi whether she would come and stay with him, and she promised. Twelve-year-old Khorshed listened eagerly, wondering why he asked only her mother and not her as well. Baba only told her, "Be good. Think of me and we will meet again." He was deliberately ignoring her so that she would become all the more eager to join him.
After his meal on Khorshed's birthday in 1926, Baba asked the women who Radha was. They guessed Gulmai, Babajan and even Gustadji. Baba pointed to Mehera and wrote that she was Radha. Then he wrote to Khorshed that she was Radha's best friend Chandrika, who was with her all the time, and that her nickname was Chandula; the other women, he added, had all been his gopis.
Before the New Life began in 1949, Baba asked Soonamasi and Khorshed to promise to do as he said. Khorshed held back, asking what use her promise was now that he was separating her from him. Baba replied, "Those who are bound by my instructions can never be separate and away from me. To keep you near me, I am seeking your promise." Khorshed then promised.
In 1929 Khorshed's father, Kaikhushru Masa, was confined by his relatives in Bombay and forced to put his property into a trust for them. When he was released a year later, Soonamasi and Khorshed brought him back to Nasik, but his health was broken. Baba came from Bombay, reaching Nasik at two in the morning, and spent the night on the verandah outside Masa's room, rising often to console him. In the morning he called Soonamasi and Khorshed and asked Khorshed to sing a ghazal, so that Masa, in the next room, stayed absorbed in thoughts of God. Masa died at one o'clock that afternoon, 18 January 1931.
In April 1933 Baba took the women mandali to Kandivli near Bombay to receive the first group of Western women. When the Westerners rushed into the house on 7 April expecting to greet him, they were met instead by Small Khorshed, who told them in broken English, "Baba found! Baba found!" Baba had hidden himself in the house and told her to ask them to find him; knowing little English, she repeated what she thought was the right message. Everyone laughed, and the game of "Avataric Hide-and-Seek" went on until Delia found him.
One day in 1947 Baba handed Khorshed an empty tin. When she asked what she was to do with it, he said only, "Keep it with you; it will be useful someday." A few days later he divided the women into groups, putting Khorshed and Soonamasi together in one group at Meherabad with its own cooking arrangements. Khorshed then understood that the tin was for storing food now that she would be cooking again, and she cherished it and kept it in a safe place.
Fortunate to Love Him: Stories of My Life with Meher Baba
Khorshed's own stories of her life with Meher Baba, from her childhood meeting with him in 1922 through the decades with Mehera and the women mandali. Published by the Avatar Meher Baba Trust in 2017 (second edition 2023) and available as a free Trust eBook.